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Thursday, April 13, 2006

Guilt

Thinking about what happened yesterday. Still have to remind myself that Oliver is, has to be, my main priority when I'm looking after him, and I can always ask for help. I don't have to assume that I can or should do everything myself. The cat vomit can wait.

Managed almost eight hours of sleep for the first time in a long time, but somehow not very rested or refreshed. Oliver was awake for about three hours in the middle of the night and his grandmother very gamely tried everything to get him to go back to sleep. I don't think I would have been able to deal with it and I feel a mixture of guilt and gratitude for not having to.

Re-reading Brian Eno's diary lately, with a new perspective on his fatherhood. He seems almost impossibly busy and yet manages to spend a lot of time with his daughters (3.5 and 5 at the time of writing) and be energetic and creative with them too.

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