He's not sleepy

The CD player plays 'Mr Tambourine Man' as Oliver settles down to sleep.


Oliver: Why did he say he's ready to go anywhere?
Me: Well, maybe because he is.
Oliver: And maybe the tambourine is magic!
Me: Magic?
Oliver: Yeah, he can use the tambourine like a frisbee.

The animal world

In the car:
Me: Oliver, do you need to go to the bathroom?
Oliver: No.
Me: Did you just fart?
Oliver: No. Uh, maybe a squirrel farted.


Mimi: Okay, who farted?
Oliver: Not me!
Me: I think it was some kind of furry mammal (rubbing Oliver's hair).
Oliver: I'm not a mammal.
Mimi: Yes, you are, because you have hair and a four-chambered heart and warm blood.
Me: And so do squirrels and cats and dogs.
Oliver: (looking around the room) Everything is mammals except lamps and radios and walls.

Science

Outdoors on an early spring day:
'Flowers mix air and electricity to make oxygen'.

'I'm going to zip up my jacket now because I've got enough oxygen'.


At toothbrush time:
'I put a filling in my tongue to make it extra tastebuddy'.

Anatomy lesson

Oliver: Where's your biggest bone?
Me: I think it's your femur, in your thigh - it goes from your knee to your hips.
Oliver: Or your butlers.
Me: Butlers?
Oliver: (points to buttocks) Yeah, these are your butlers!

***

Oliver: Where are your large and small einsteins?

Recent quotes

On hearing Mimi make reference to Miami during dinnertime conversation:
Oliver: 'Mommy, where is your ammy?'


After I repeatedly failed to get past the Easy level battle in Guitar Hero III:
'Daddy, I wish you would rock, instead of Tom Morello'.


Before falling asleep:
Oliver: (impatiently) When is it going to be morning?
Me: In about 9 hours.
Oliver: (sighing)

[pause for about 30 seconds]

Oliver: Daddy?
Me: Yes?
Oliver: Eight hours now?

Familiar game, new name

I arrived at Oliver's school to pick him up and found him playing cards with this friend M.

M.: Do you have any fives?
Oliver: No. Goldfish!

And M picked up a card from the deck.

Inquiring minds

This afternoon I went to talk to Oliver and his preschool friends about the Dutch holiday of Sinterklaas (St Nicholas), which is on December 5 each year.

Some of the kid already knew me, so I figured it was a good idea to go around the circle and get introductions, although it dissolved halfway into 'Do you know what HIS name is?' and discussion of twin brothers who were allegedly aged 4 and 5 and the differences between their outfits.

It was generally chaotic but entertaining, given the various attention spans and inspired lines of questioning.

Who knows what today's date is?

'2008!'

'December the twelfth!'

December the 5th? 'No, December the five.'

On the subject of Holland:

'I've been to Holland! No ... it was Costa Rica!'

'I went to my grandma's farm once!'

On the chocolate initial letters that people give each other (for the first initial of their first name):

Girl: So I'd get a W because my name starts with W!

Me: What's your name?

Girl: L____.

Recent quotes

(on being congratulated for behaving well at school)
'Yep. You gotta keeeep your ... self-control'.


'They're called boxed shorts 'cause they're shaped like a box'.